Wednesday, September 21, 2011

the best of you

"Is someone getting the best, the best, the best, the best of you?"
-Foo Fighters



All my life, I've been trying to figure out how to break free of my old self, morphing into a better version of me. Every time I'm unsuccessful, I think it's because I didn't try hard enough, or because I will just never be able to break free. I've recently discovered that the world is just not ready for it yet, or perhaps I'm just not ready for it yet. But, my time WILL come. And I feel that time is soon, so I wait eagerly for my breakthrough.

I always thought it was odd that I'm more comfortable with some guys I like than with others, thinking I was somehow at fault for not being comfortable enough to "let go," when now I'm realizing that some just couldn't handle a different version of me. Or maybe I know that the person will not be the right kind of person to stand by me when I've morphed into something else. For whatever reason, I've found someone that I honestly think could handle the various shapings of me, and vice versa... but I don't even know if he likes me and that is something I'm trying to stop worrying about for now. I have too much on my mind already, so I will wait until the time is right to give someone the best of me. And I will anxiously wait until I am trusted enough to get the best of somebody in return. I can't wait.

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